Story of A Spider

 “I’ve lost my mind.” I mumble to myself.

I am sitting on my dorm floor, looking a big ugly spider sitting in the corner. My roommate and suitemates are out.

“Just kill the spider.” I tell myself.

But it isn’t bothering me. There is no one else around for it to bother, either.

I stand up and go to my desk. If I have to poke the spider out of the corner anyway in order to kill it, why not scoop it into a cup and release it outside?

Because it’s a spider, that’s why! It’s entirely unnecessary.  

I glance back at the creepy crawler. It is sitting totally still.

I sigh and grab a throwaway cup and a folder off my dresser. “I’m crazy.”

Bending down, I place the cup right against the corner. Carefully, I poke at the spider with the corner of my folder.

It runs into the cup, which I set upright quickly and cover with my folder. I smile. Success! Then I look down and realize I’m in my pajamas, and my hair is wet.

                Whatever, I think. I’ll only be outside for a second. I pull on a hoodie, though, just because.

                Then I remember. The door at the end of my hall sets off an alarm if it is open for more than 15 seconds. The door at the end of my hall doesn’t let you come back in through it.

                If I go outside, I’ll have to walk all the way back around to get back in. I look at the spider. I should just kill it and be done.

                “But it’s already caught,” I think. “I’m already committed.”

                So, I grab my ID and my key, shove them in my pocket and pick up the troublesome spider. “You’re lucky I’m alone in this room. Otherwise I would have killed you immediately.”

                I open my room door to leave, and as soon as I do, a wasp flies right in. I glare at it. “No, no, no no, no. I am not doing this again! Get out here.” The wasp ignores me and lands on my closet.

                But my hands are still full of my spider trap. “Fine, stay there.” I close the door and walk outside, hair wet, feet bare, and a spider in a cup. The hall door closes behind me and I walk into the grass, mumbling about my lack of sanity. I release the spider, telling it, “Don’t even think of coming back in.”

                It scurries off and I walk to the front door of my dorm. I go back into the building, down the stairs, and back to my room.

                I walk in and stare at the wasp… and proceed to repeat my insane process for a second time.

                What? I can’t kill a wasp! What if I miss? It would sting me.

                So back out my exit door I go. “I really must be crazy. I must be totally out of my mind,” I say aloud.

                But I release the wasp. And as I walk back inside, I look at the sky settling into its evening colors and feel a weird sort of happiness. Maybe the happiness came from getting to walk outside and see the sunset because of those bugs. Maybe it was because that spider and that wasp really weren’t bothering anyone. So didn’t they deserve a chance to live?

                 Perhaps those bugs were there to remind me that life is valuable, in any form. Just because we have the power to inflict pain, doesn’t mean we should.

                Or maybe, just maybe, I’m just plain crazy.